feeling sad

today, i just attended a seminar about the IPTA.
seeing most of the students score well in their stpm.
feeling quite sad when i found out most of the courses i like require high cgpa.
OMG!
i still scared of asking questions in english.
i mean, i can write properly but i cannot speak properly. why?
all those english words was organize very well in my head,
but when it came to my mouth, it just appear like shit.
why is it so?
is it nervous? or i have kind of speaking problems?
i think it is because of no confidence in myself.

When i'm trying to asking the counsellor, i feel kind of looking down by him.
the first time i'm asking him.
he misunderstanding, when i'm trying to explain the actual thing i wanted to convey was.
i just lost my words,i did not know how to tell a words.
what a pity me.

am i too sensitive or it is really what i'm thinking?
anyways, after writing it out, i feel such a relieve.
i hope that i'm too sensitive.

goodnite, blogger!